H-I had a moment today. Me-Oh you did. What happened? H-Yeah, just got really upset at Elle and needed to cry. Me-Did you get it out of your system? H-Yeah, as long as Elle behaves herself. E-Oh geez.
Since the girls are two completely different emotional beings and handle things completely different in almost every way, parenting becomes a game of trying to figure out the best way to deal with that child, in that moment, to help them move forward from whatever phase they’re in at that time.
Sometimes when you give the girls something, they tend to take that something and run with it. A word or phrase can easily be made into an excuse. Once they have that excuse they hang on to it tightly and use it regularly. Often times to the point of abusing said excuse.
In an effort to curb Hudson’s recent bout with instantaneous crying at basically nothing, I had the bright idea to tell her that she was having “a moment,” and that she needed to just relax and collect herself. I also let her know that we all have our “moments,” and that it was ok to get upset, she just needs to learn to recognize when she’s having one. She of course responded really well to this, especially knowing that she wasn’t alone in her frequently emotional state.
I felt good about making her feel comfortable and ok with being emotional, but at the same time I knew that it was only a matter of time before she was going to abuse it. So for the next several days, Huds would come to my crying, saying she was having a moment, and I’d let her have it. It was at the point when she got in a fight with her sister, and as I was yelling at her, she screamed at me, “I’m having a moment! OK!” that I knew this one had run it’s course. I informed her that “having a moment” was not an excuse to hit her sister and sent her to her room.
Since I informed her she wasn’t allowed to use it as a daily excuse to be bad, Huds hasn’t had as many “moments” lately which is good. I guess she’s moved on to the next phase. Now I just have to figure out how to deal with what’s coming next.